i'm lost and i look like a hooker
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
