You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
