just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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