nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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