I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
