Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize