thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
