Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
