Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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