She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
