You really coming over, don't trick.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
