Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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