I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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