So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Randomize
