Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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