please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
