I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
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