to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you would pick up someone in the library
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just want nice things and good sex
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
