Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize