quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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