Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
