I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
