he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
