Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I wish i was in the wii world.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
