Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
