I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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