Plan B is the new Plan A
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Never underestimate the power of titties
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize