I just made out with a guy for $7.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
