WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
