do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
