i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize