He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
