i may or may not be watching the land before time
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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