he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
