that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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