He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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