Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
