i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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