She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
