I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Every concussion has its silver lining
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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