i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize