I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I love you. Go after that dick
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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