I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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