her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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