four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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