I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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