I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize