I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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