He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
