I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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