I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize