There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
