I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize