Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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